So much shittiness, so little time
ESPN.com article on September in baseball.
WILL THIS METS-PHILLIES SAGA HAVE A DIFFERENT ENDING?
I don't know, probably.
Jayson Stark breaks it down for me
Here's the record of these teams in games decided after the sixth inning (meaning the score was tied after six, or the lead changed): Phillies 31-15, Mets 11-22. Nobody we've talked to thinks that stat is an aberration.
"One part of it, obviously, is the difference in bullpens," one scout said. "But the other part of it is heart. I love the Phillies' grit.
I can see how bullpens would make a difference, schedule and injuries to key players may make a bigger one. Obviously grit and heart the biggest.
Friday, 29 August 2008
Thursday, 28 August 2008
News Corp let me down again!
I've been worrying about the distinct lack of quality of Times leaders for a while. However the second paragraph in today's piece entitled
Australia: Dingoland
is particularly special
The trouble with wilderness, as they see it, is that when you get there, there is no there there.
I stopped reading after that. It's like they just don't care anymore.
Speaking of not caring anymore, the hand of Sky Sports has touched Steve Kirby, after Patel and Bopara last year, and Napier in the first half of this year. Steve Kirby has been touted for England after two good performances on TV.
During yesterday's game Nick Knight was thrilled about him and detailed to us how Steve Kirby is a quick learner and has obviously matured, but still has a few things to learn (hot to bowl a yorker, mix up his lengths etc.)
You would be forgiven for thinking Kirby was a 21 year old firebrand. But he is 31 in a month! He has played 98 first class games! What about that makes you think he has learnt anything? Why should he play for England? What has possessed Nick Knight?
Nick Knight also masturbated over Eoin Morgan and his "array of shots" (I'm pretty sure he can only play a really shitty pre-meditated sweep and nothing else). However I will let that pass as he is at least young.
N.B. I love Steve Kirby and his awesome ball-tampering ways, this is meant as a knock to Verity more than anything else.
Australia: Dingoland
is particularly special
The trouble with wilderness, as they see it, is that when you get there, there is no there there.
I stopped reading after that. It's like they just don't care anymore.
Speaking of not caring anymore, the hand of Sky Sports has touched Steve Kirby, after Patel and Bopara last year, and Napier in the first half of this year. Steve Kirby has been touted for England after two good performances on TV.
During yesterday's game Nick Knight was thrilled about him and detailed to us how Steve Kirby is a quick learner and has obviously matured, but still has a few things to learn (hot to bowl a yorker, mix up his lengths etc.)
You would be forgiven for thinking Kirby was a 21 year old firebrand. But he is 31 in a month! He has played 98 first class games! What about that makes you think he has learnt anything? Why should he play for England? What has possessed Nick Knight?
Nick Knight also masturbated over Eoin Morgan and his "array of shots" (I'm pretty sure he can only play a really shitty pre-meditated sweep and nothing else). However I will let that pass as he is at least young.
N.B. I love Steve Kirby and his awesome ball-tampering ways, this is meant as a knock to Verity more than anything else.
Labels:
ball-tampering,
Cricket,
eoin morgan,
nick knight,
sky sports,
steve kirby,
the times
Tuesday, 26 August 2008
Joy to the world...
Bopara is dropped. Hopefully that's the last we see of that talentless little piss stain.
That is all.
That is all.
Sophie's Choice '08: America Decides
This update from the world of American politics; identikit Fox News woman (I can't tell them apart other than Edith Ann Tarbox) talking about polling for the election:
In the latest poll released after Sen. Joseph Biden was chosen as the VP nominee for the Democrats, Sen Barack Obama and Sen John McCain are literally neck-and-neck
I'm unsure if this is some sort of mating ritual or perhaps a prelude to some sort of fight to the death over the presidency. Either way, I'm not sure it matters as neither would manage a four year term without dying in office- they might as well finish each other off now (or at least in time for Gov. Huckabee to get the Republican nomination next week).
In the latest poll released after Sen. Joseph Biden was chosen as the VP nominee for the Democrats, Sen Barack Obama and Sen John McCain are literally neck-and-neck
I'm unsure if this is some sort of mating ritual or perhaps a prelude to some sort of fight to the death over the presidency. Either way, I'm not sure it matters as neither would manage a four year term without dying in office- they might as well finish each other off now (or at least in time for Gov. Huckabee to get the Republican nomination next week).
Thursday, 14 August 2008
Getting it Right?
The DUP, yet again, are so close.
From their website:

Obviously their commitment to accuracy only goes so far. Apostrophes are a tool of papal authority, or something, and are absent from the party's website.
From their website:

Obviously their commitment to accuracy only goes so far. Apostrophes are a tool of papal authority, or something, and are absent from the party's website.
And the winner is...no one
No one indeed. For the 29,811th day in a row, we are all losers.
The BBC are at it again. At least this time their amateurism fits in- it's the Olympics.
Two marvellous instances of what can only be described as retartdism this morning. First, the men's 100m freestyle final (that's two lengths of front crawl swimming to you and me). This link will take you to the iPlayer recording of the race.
This is the commentary 1.57 in:
Aiden (whoever he might be): He got it, well, [sarcastically] comfortably; by enough.
Commentator 2: By 11 one-hundredths, Aiden.
A: That's enough
C2: Miles
A: That's nearly a tenth
Speaks for itself. I will add nothing.
The other moron moment on the BBC this morning was that Scottish bint (I think she's called Hazel Irvine but I'm not totally sure) saying that someone was:
Literally hounded
I think she was wrong. They are however in Beijing so there's no way to be certain.
The BBC are at it again. At least this time their amateurism fits in- it's the Olympics.
Two marvellous instances of what can only be described as retartdism this morning. First, the men's 100m freestyle final (that's two lengths of front crawl swimming to you and me). This link will take you to the iPlayer recording of the race.
This is the commentary 1.57 in:
Aiden (whoever he might be): He got it, well, [sarcastically] comfortably; by enough.
Commentator 2: By 11 one-hundredths, Aiden.
A: That's enough
C2: Miles
A: That's nearly a tenth
Speaks for itself. I will add nothing.
The other moron moment on the BBC this morning was that Scottish bint (I think she's called Hazel Irvine but I'm not totally sure) saying that someone was:
Literally hounded
I think she was wrong. They are however in Beijing so there's no way to be certain.
Wednesday, 13 August 2008
In Defence of Development Aid
I am the archetypal free-marketeer. I make no apologies for being right, never have done and never will do. However there is one area where I believe development aid and government intervention is in my best interests.
Northern cities 'beyond revival'
This think-tank tells a familiar tale, and I think we are all aware that development money fails in its initial goal. I don't think after 25 years of 're-development' Liverpool (as an example) is any more livable or has many more opportunities than before. Most of these are structural, the things that made Liverpool grow simply no longer exist, pumping in random amounts of money isn't going to help that.
On a simple free-market basis you can claim therefore that people should be told the facts and encourage them to move to the South-East.
This is where I have a problem, people do know the facts. Myself and many like me have already moved to London from relatively depressed areas to seek out opportunities. The people who do this are usually educated and ambitious (I'm excluding myself from these criteria). So what's left in Liverpool and cities like it? Functional illiterates and crack-addicts? Why would I want them down here, never mind encourage them to make the move?
My argument therefore is that the North acts like a giant open-prison but at a mere fraction of the cost (Nothing is worth nicking up there anyway). If the population of Liverpool (436,100) moved down to London they would almost certainly wind up in prison, and it would cost £14,342,456,800 to house them all (at £32,888 p.a.). Regional development aid is a lot cheaper than that, and I haven't even started on Manchester yet (anyone from Salford would be in a high-security unit).
I say, if they are happy up there away from us, and we are willing to save money on prisons to subsidise them then let's carry on (plus they bring a ready supply of me for our armed-forces).
Northern cities 'beyond revival'
This think-tank tells a familiar tale, and I think we are all aware that development money fails in its initial goal. I don't think after 25 years of 're-development' Liverpool (as an example) is any more livable or has many more opportunities than before. Most of these are structural, the things that made Liverpool grow simply no longer exist, pumping in random amounts of money isn't going to help that.
On a simple free-market basis you can claim therefore that people should be told the facts and encourage them to move to the South-East.
This is where I have a problem, people do know the facts. Myself and many like me have already moved to London from relatively depressed areas to seek out opportunities. The people who do this are usually educated and ambitious (I'm excluding myself from these criteria). So what's left in Liverpool and cities like it? Functional illiterates and crack-addicts? Why would I want them down here, never mind encourage them to make the move?
My argument therefore is that the North acts like a giant open-prison but at a mere fraction of the cost (Nothing is worth nicking up there anyway). If the population of Liverpool (436,100) moved down to London they would almost certainly wind up in prison, and it would cost £14,342,456,800 to house them all (at £32,888 p.a.). Regional development aid is a lot cheaper than that, and I haven't even started on Manchester yet (anyone from Salford would be in a high-security unit).
I say, if they are happy up there away from us, and we are willing to save money on prisons to subsidise them then let's carry on (plus they bring a ready supply of me for our armed-forces).
Tuesday, 12 August 2008
Fancy a Laugh?
Oi! Dr Millionaire! Dibbles here, can I nominate Daily Mail readers for the prestigious "What a load of cunts!" award? Namely the morons who list comments on their fabled website?
I enjoyed this typical Daily Mail article.
You know the sort of thing, white elderly man bemoans falling standards. Good honest fare. However, what made the article for me were the 51 (and counting) comments also bemoaning falling standards in grammar and spelling in public life.
An example...
Anyone can make a mistook............., though not as many as the judges in their sentencing of the criminals.
- Dave, cambs, 12/8/2008 7:48.
The best one, of course, goes to my old friend of Charles Edward Taylor of Corby (and one presumes via Liberia).
I am astounded by the lack of simple skills in people who have jn many cases received higher education and in some, univarsity,the use of language is the only way of communicaring and should be presented correctly, Well done the Judge!.
- charles edward taylor, corby, northamptonshire, 12/8/2008 7:54
You could argue that 51 Mail readers have taken it on themselves to be highly amusing by littering every comment with spelling and grammatical errors. That, or Mail readers are stupid fucking cunts. I know which one sounds more plausible.
So do they win?
I enjoyed this typical Daily Mail article.
You know the sort of thing, white elderly man bemoans falling standards. Good honest fare. However, what made the article for me were the 51 (and counting) comments also bemoaning falling standards in grammar and spelling in public life.
An example...
Anyone can make a mistook............., though not as many as the judges in their sentencing of the criminals.
- Dave, cambs, 12/8/2008 7:48.
The best one, of course, goes to my old friend of Charles Edward Taylor of Corby (and one presumes via Liberia).
I am astounded by the lack of simple skills in people who have jn many cases received higher education and in some, univarsity,the use of language is the only way of communicaring and should be presented correctly, Well done the Judge!.
- charles edward taylor, corby, northamptonshire, 12/8/2008 7:54
You could argue that 51 Mail readers have taken it on themselves to be highly amusing by littering every comment with spelling and grammatical errors. That, or Mail readers are stupid fucking cunts. I know which one sounds more plausible.
So do they win?
Monday, 11 August 2008
The first recipient of the "what a bunch of cunts" award
A lot of people really like the BBC. Old folks especially see it as a venerated, distinguished institution, a bit like the NHS (in that is outdated and quite literally worse than useless I suppose).
I was reading a piece on the climax of the final test against South Africa (quite what the fuck the final test is doing finishing on the 11th August is beyond me- astonoshing) and came across this paragraph:
Morne Morkel, who, like Forrest Gump, was revealed to be suffering from an injury to the buttock, was fast and hostile but mostly erratic.
What in the name of all that is good and holy is this shitty paragraph doing in a piece of so called professional journalism? Not only does a joke (and I can only assume it is a joke of some sort, despite being about as funny as the Holocaust) have absolutely no place here, I have shitted funnier things than that. I am being utterly literal. I have actually shitted things that are much more amusing than this piss poor exscuse for a piece of journalism.
Ladies and gentlemen, may I remind you that we are paying for someone to write this drivel thanks to the unique way the BBC is funded (i.e. the atavistic communist-style television tax).
What a bunch of dim-witted, cock-sucking, morose, up their own arse, public school, Trotskyite cunts they are.
I was reading a piece on the climax of the final test against South Africa (quite what the fuck the final test is doing finishing on the 11th August is beyond me- astonoshing) and came across this paragraph:
Morne Morkel, who, like Forrest Gump, was revealed to be suffering from an injury to the buttock, was fast and hostile but mostly erratic.
What in the name of all that is good and holy is this shitty paragraph doing in a piece of so called professional journalism? Not only does a joke (and I can only assume it is a joke of some sort, despite being about as funny as the Holocaust) have absolutely no place here, I have shitted funnier things than that. I am being utterly literal. I have actually shitted things that are much more amusing than this piss poor exscuse for a piece of journalism.
Ladies and gentlemen, may I remind you that we are paying for someone to write this drivel thanks to the unique way the BBC is funded (i.e. the atavistic communist-style television tax).
What a bunch of dim-witted, cock-sucking, morose, up their own arse, public school, Trotskyite cunts they are.
Labels:
BBC,
socialism,
the "what a bunch of cunts" award
Not News: Issue 3
You may very well be asking yourself "does Barnardo only ever read the BBC 'News' website for news and current affairs, it's all he ever seems to comment on?".
I can see where you're coming from. I do post predominantly about stories from the BBC 'News' website. This however does not represent the amount of time I spend reading the BBC site but rather the relative utter shittness of BBC 'News'.
One of the things that riles me most is when they report on things that do not constitute news, particularly when they proceed to put that 'news' in their ticker.
I am well riled. Have a look at this:

And this link to the story above.
I'm going to be totally honest with you, I haven't read this story. Instead of reading the latest news on kids being nasty to each other, I'm off to read about the stirrings of World War 3 over in Georgia or perhaps something to do with the human rights abuses of the host country of the Olympic Games, China.
Or maybe I'll just go and have a shit. Who knows?
I can see where you're coming from. I do post predominantly about stories from the BBC 'News' website. This however does not represent the amount of time I spend reading the BBC site but rather the relative utter shittness of BBC 'News'.
One of the things that riles me most is when they report on things that do not constitute news, particularly when they proceed to put that 'news' in their ticker.
I am well riled. Have a look at this:

And this link to the story above.
I'm going to be totally honest with you, I haven't read this story. Instead of reading the latest news on kids being nasty to each other, I'm off to read about the stirrings of World War 3 over in Georgia or perhaps something to do with the human rights abuses of the host country of the Olympic Games, China.
Or maybe I'll just go and have a shit. Who knows?
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